52 Ancestors Challenge - Week 8 - Courting

 This weeks #52ancestors challenge got me thinking  - where did my ancestors meet?

In the 20^th century, my parents met at the local dance halls, attending the weekly ‘shin-dig’ at the Hermitage Halls in Hitchin and The Icknield Halls and The Wilbury in Letchworth.   These were the main places for young people to meet in the 1930s and 1940s, with the added attraction of servicemen from nearby Bassingbourn and Chicksands.  There were also village halls that held dances and church events.  Other places to meet your future spouse were at work, or even earlier, at school.   The social parameters for meeting your future consort were usually a bike, bus, or train ride away from home, with further afield possible if someone owned a car.  When my parents were young, if a chap owned a car, it could be a magnet for the young ladies! 

In the early 20^th century, my Hertfordshire maternal family did not travel very far away from Hitchin when they chose their partners.  My Grandparents attended the same school, The British School, in Hitchin with their families living close to each other in the town. 

The Morgan family worshipped in the Congregational Church in Queen Street, alas now demolished, as did my Mum and her siblings.  They went to church every week. The Morgan’s (paternal) had been nonconformist since the early 1800s, which added a different dimension to my family research.  The Taylor’s (maternal) were Church of England, worshipping at St Mary’s in the town.  You attended the church of the male member of the marriage, hence my grandparents attending the Congregational church with their 6 children. 

Further back in time my Hertfordshire ancestors mostly lived within a 20-mile radius of Hitchin, so really haven’t moved very far at all in hundreds of years. Several siblings of my Great Grandmother Morgan, maiden name Moules, moved to Keighley in Yorkshire for work, and some of the sisters of my Great Grandmother Taylor, maiden name Cotton, moved away once they married.  But, on the whole, my family largely ‘stayed put’.  In north Hertfordshire, the county boundary with Bedfordshire is very close so I do have some Bedfordshire ancestry too. 

 

Lack of work in a largely rural county like Hertfordshire caused some people to move further away.  With the advent of the railway in Hitchin in the 1850s London was only a train ride away.  My grandfather Morgan worked on the railways as a plate layer, with this father-in-law, Arthur Taylor being a carpenter on the railways, both based at Hitchin station.  Economic forces were the main catalyst for people moving away from their family roots in my family, and also marriage, with females moving with their husbands to another part of the country.

My Suffolk Nickels family, my dad’s family, are a little more interesting.  As previously mentioned in these #52ancestors blogs, my dad was born in 1916 in the First Garden City of Letchworth in Hertfordshire.  His father moved to Hertfordshire in about 1910 to work on the building of Letchworth.  There are still examples of his creative leadwork at The Cloisters in Letchworth.  He also worked for the company who installed the plumbing at The Spirella in Letchworth, and at George Bernard Shaw’s home at Ayot St Lawrence. 

My Dad’s brothers and sisters, however, were born in different places. The 1911 Census helped me work out where the family were living between 1901 and 1911. My grandparents, Alf and Alice, met in London and were married in 1901. Their first child Alf was born in 1902, in Walworth, London.  Jim was born in 1903, with Violet appearing in 1907 whilst the family were living in Camberwell Green.  The next child, Dick, was born in Walsworth, Hertfordshire in 1911, with Nellie and Nick (Dad) born in Letchworth in 1914 and 1916.  Basil and Bella, from Grandad’s second marriage were also born at the family home, 76 Shott Lane, Letchworth, in 1919 and 1921.

My grandad Alf’s parents, Alfred John and Elizabeth were living in Hertfordshire by 1899 as he was Licensee of The Willian Arms pub in Willian, Hertfordshire, near the new Garden City site.  Their journey to Hertfordshire is more interesting.  Alf was born in Suffolk in 1850, with Elizabeth born in Dorset in 1838 – quite an age gap!   They met in London. I guess both had gone to the metropolis in search of work.  

From my research, Alfred John already had two brothers who had gone to live and work in London before he too moved there.  Elizabeth was working in service after she was widowed, initially in Dorset, so may have travelled to London with her employer and decided to settle there.  Her teenage daughter, Mary, who had been brought up by her grandmother and aunt whilst Elizabeth worked was living with her mother by 1871.  Alfred John and Elizabeth married in the early 1870s.

The Nickels family were from Suffolk.  They had lived in Orford, Wickham Market, Sutton, Badingham and the surrounding area since at least the 17^th century. My ancestors would have met their future partners in their towns, at the market, in the pub (most probably), at work or at church.  Most spouses came from the same town or village, or one a few miles away, certainly within walking distance on a market day.  My Nickels family have successive generations who were publicans, from Gt-Gt-Gt Grandfather William Nickels, who died in 1844, right up to my uncle Basil.  As ‘Mine Host’, they would have been well known in the town or village.  Strong ladies, such as William Nickels’ wife Elizabeth, would take over the licence of The Chequers at Wickham Market when William died, with her daughter Louisa taking over from her.  A supportive wife who was happy to ‘muck in’ was essential. Daughters and nieces are found to have worked as barmaids  -  another way of meeting young men.  Oh, how I’d love to do a ‘pub crawl’ of all the pubs my relations ran! 

With my main line of Dominey’s from Poole, Dorset, they seem to have met their spouses locally, most probably via the church.  The family worshipped at both St James’ and as Skinner Street Independent, now the United Reformed. 

One ancestor was Parish Clerk at Lytchett.  Occasionally with this family, I have found a spouse coming from elsewhere, usually when they are in the army or navy and posted to the area or town of my ancestral family.  It must be remembered that Poole was a port, so there would have been opportunities to meet people from different places.  One branch of the Dominey's had a connection with Newfoundland and Canada.

My Sutch’s from London, my paternal grandmother’s family, were more adventurous with their connections with the music hall stage and music in general, but, their choice of partner seems to be very much local to their family home even though London, offers possibilities for meeting people from all over the place.  There was the story that Grandad Sutch had married beneath him when he married Jane Woodman.  He was on the stage, and doing quite well, she was a butcher’s daughter, but there seem to have been some troubles within her family.  I wonder how they met?  Probably the pub, or maybe even the stage door.  Their families both lived in the same area of London, near to St Martin in the Fields and Bond Street.  After their marriage they moved to South London, Walworth, Kennington and Camberwell.

With my direct family lines, there are not any surprises with choices of spouses.  Most were living in the same place, or nearby.  Many families had lived in the same location for many years. 

I have connections with London with my paternal family who initially moved from Suffolk and Dorset to London and then to Hertfordshire, moving because of work opportunities with expansion in the metropolis and with the new Garden City in Hertfordshire.    

My Hertfordshire family didn’t move far.  They were mostly agricultural labourers, publicans (again) and working in trades in Hitchin like the railway and also diversifying to driving carts for businesses, laundresses, coalmen, and of course straw plaiters.  Hitchin is near to Luton in Bedfordshire, a centre for straw hat making.  I have found whole families of straw plaiters, wives and big families of children, supplementing the wage of the head of the household.  Not just the girls either, many small boys, my granddad included, learn how to straw plait.

As I have found with my family, there are be multiple connections with families who have long lived in the same location.  Cousins marrying, siblings marrying siblings and the intermarrying of families over many generations.  Many years ago whilst talking to some friends, family connections came into the conversation and my mum and a business colleague of my dad worked out that they were cousins through a marriage within their respective families.  Similarly, a work colleague and I found out that were both descended from Edward and Dinah Hunt from Orford, Suffolk¹.  It's a small world.

Notes

1.      Nickels, Jane ‘Was it Coincidence or Fate?’ in Suffolk Roots, Volume 20, No 4, February 1995.

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